Korean ‘Chefs’ Attack Italian Cuisine!

Posted in Uncategorized on December 6, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

Do not go to Macaroni Market in Itaewon. It is quite possibly the worst attempt at Italian food I’ve ever had the misfortune to be served. And that’s coming from someone who has lived in Korea for quite some time so I have seen some foodcrime atrocities of the highest order. This time the crime is not just the dreadful food, but also the deception and fraud like nature of their activities in Itaewon.

Walking into the place the initial impression is that it will actually be quite reasonable. The waiters are all smart and attentive, the room is roomy and nice, it has an open kitchen, all very good things. I should have had my alarm bells ringing when I noticed that all the chefs were Korean!

I ordered the Vongole, the missus ordered some Tomato thing (I didn’t catch the name of the dish). The missus’ was edible-nothing special, my pasta was not cooked. I’m not talking al dente as it should be, but about 5 minutes undercooked and I had to send it back, it was replaced and this time they hadn’t bothered cleaning the clams properly and they were full of grit. I filled up on bread, the bread was actually OK.

I asked for the wine list and was frankly fucking astonished about how expensive it was! The prices were ludicrous, 80 thousand won for plonk, 200+ for anything half decent. Absolutely fucking ridiculously overpriced, we mostly drank water.

All in all 3 glasses of Champagne, 1 Glass of nasty white wine and two very very mediocre tiny portions of spaghetti with sauce and a bit of bread, set us back a cool 80.000 won. Fucking outrageously overpriced, and the food was terrible, for that kind of money I’d expect something a little better. I could make that meal myself 10x better and for a tenth the cost. We were a party of ten so the bill’s total was about 400,000 won! Nobody was impressed with their food. That is basically theft as far as I’m concerned

To the food criminals at Macaroni Market a hearty ‘F**k YOU!’. Do not go there, it is shit. Avoid this crappy place like the plague. It may look nice inside and the food does look OK, but it is simply very expensive crap. I’m not a cheapskate, I’ll willingly hand over a wad of money to a restaurant that produces quality, I do recognise that you have to pay for quality. However I do not appreciate being ripped off and conned and that is the foodcrime that Macaroni Market are guilty off.

I sincerely hope that some Italian mobsters get wind of this place and kneecap the proprietors of this insult to Italian cuisine.

Advertisements

Bundaegi

Posted in Uncategorized on December 5, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

Yummy! ;p

Nasty shit, and I can’t believe I haven’t posted an exposé of this shocking foodcrime. Any convenience store in Korea will carry this delicacy in a canned form. The worst however is when it is sold on the street, generally it is steaming and the liquid evaporating of the larvae smells just like urine!

Hmm! A tasty treat of ‘urine bugs’ is what we all want to quaff down after a few beers isn’t it?

I did try Bee Larvae in Vietnam, that was pretty disgusting but at least it didn’t smell of piss.

Vankers!

Posted in Uncategorized on December 3, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

First off, sorry for the lack of updates recently. I’ve got a whole load of cases and could really do with an assistant-intern to help out tracking down and researching rogue foodcrime miscreants.

This post is inspired by the ‘Vankers’ a Korean group dedicated to misleading people into believing that ‘The Sea of Japan’ is actually ‘The East Sea’ despite the fact that ‘East’ is relative and if Japan didn’t exist it would be called ‘The Pacific Ocean’, the Vankers certainly wish that Japan didn’t exist. Copernicus and Galileo got into less trouble with religious idiots than you would if you mentioned Takeshima or The Sea of Japan to these nutjobs! Anyway back to foodcrime as I stumbled upon this illiterate piece of nonsense on their site earlier. They’re not just promoting foodcrime, but ‘language crime’ judging by a cursory look through their site!

Globalization of Korean Food
2009-09-15

Recently in Korea, to make Korean food globalize prevails. Because, it would be able to let Korean culture being introduced through that and Koreans can generate high added value. Eating healthy foods is today’s trend. In this point, Korean food has a lot of possibilities to succeed in the world’s food market. Chinese and Japanese foods which are East Asian foods proved it already.

Korean food is worth to being confident. But the reality is far more than the ideal. Most of the overseas Korean restaurants are putting out of business, and most of the customers are Korean tourists or the Koreans who live in overseas. Sometimes the coolest restaurants get the motive from the Korean food, but most of the foreigners don’t know that was coming from Korean food.

It happens because Korean foods are not familiar with most foreigners in the world. Most foreigners had or heard Japanese Susi or Soba but less people know Korean foods like Kimchi and Bulgogi. Even those people know only little or partial information, such as Korean food is hot and spicy. These cause the prejudices that Korean foods are not good for health and unsanitary.

It happens because of several reasons follow. First, foreigners couldn’t get accurate information about Korean food before. Most websites which introduce Korean foods provide only simple and short introductions about each Korean foods and recipes. For example Bulgogi is this or Kimchi is this. These introductions are not appropriate to introduce uniqueness of Korean foods’ culture like Hangsang, which means you put all prepared foods in one table. It’s rather to introduce one cuisine with further side dishes together which goes well with that cuisine. Furthermore, it could be better if these websites introduce table manners and Korean food culture together and it makes foreigners like you would be much familiar with Korean foods.

Second, Koreans need to introduce Korean foods in the point of view of foreigners not Koreans. I think it is important to combine Korean food with other countries’ food culture as well as to introduce Korean foods. Especially there are some parts in Korean food culture which is not acceptable for most foreigners, such as table setting or eating the food in a dish together.
So I think Koreans should improve that matters for foreigners not to feel reluctance.

Third, when they foreigners try to prepare or learn how to cook Korean foods, they always should face so many Korean and abstract words that are difficult to understand and buy. These words should be translated into the exact and replaced words.

I think it’s important to research how to make better taste of Korean foods for foreigners. Although Koreans like normal tastes of Korean foods and is still good for health, but it can be felt differently for foreigners. In order to do this, we should survey the foreigners’ opinions and understand which is to be corrected or which is to be used.

I think if these things improved sooner or later, Korean foods could be much familiar for foreigners in the world.

By Gunseon Jin

Gunsone Jin is a foodcrime denier of the highest order, and a serious threat to both the food world and the English language.

Thailand,  the EU countries, the US,  Australia, Mexico, China, Vietnam, Morocco and many other places around the world don’t promote their food, they don’t need to as a lot of it is bloody fantastic. The cuisines promote themselves by being fucking brilliant. When it comes to grandiose ideas about promoting ‘ Hansick’ (Korean food) I think why bother? Polishing a turd is a fairly pointless activity, kind of like putting lipstick on a pig. Most foreigners don’t need education regarding Korean food. If they like food, and have any kind of palate, Korean food is pretty much at the bottom of the list. My question to the Vankers is ‘Why promote eating shit?’

I really need make no more comment, the accused has basically admitted his crimes.

‘Gayness’ @ Tous Les Jours

Posted in Uncategorized on October 4, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

Frankly I don’t have a problem with gay folks, like vegetarianism, it’s really none of my business what you decide to shove in your face (or in your arse). However, some of the adverts for the foodcrime bakery chain Tous Les Jours are frankly worrying in their ‘high camp’ styles. Gay people are not retarded, and the way that ‘camp’ is portrayed in their ads is deeply worrying and could lead to ‘hate’ speech and even attacks on homosexuals.

Evidence #1 The insipid music, the dreadful ‘acting’, it all makes me retch. Some Koreans seem to think ‘retarded’ is cute. I don’t find retarded people cute, Forrest Gump was OK as a film but I don’t fancy that Hanks fella, Hoffman was excellent in ‘Rainman’ but you wouldn’t catch me chewing his sausage (nor one of TLJ’s revolting Pizza -with hotdog- abominations). As well as Tous Les Jours producing some of the worst baking I’ve ever had the misfortune to consume (hmm sugared Garlic Bread anyone?) they also produce TV crime making them doubly culpable for their sins. Why can’t Korean bakery chains produce quality bread like they manage to make in Vietnam. I guess you could blame the poor standard of Korea’s bakeries on the fact that the Vietnamese were colonized by the French whereas the Koreans were colonized by the Japanese. So sad.

Evidence #2 ‘I’m corny, corny, corny, corny!’

Evidence #3 Retarded faces. A book is not a good disguise and would only fool an utter moron, a pen is not a bloody moustache, and a Postit note is not something you stick to your face, normal people post them on a desk, computer monitor or a shelf, if you post it on your face how can you read the fucking thing???. And, NO your ‘faces’ are not cute, and in fact you look like cretins

Case closed, defendants guilty, 20 years and no parole.

My neighbours (no shit) Big Bang are queer and have girls swarming over them. I guess the old adage that you ‘can’t always get what you want’ runs especially true if you’re a hetro girl and you really want a gay man. It must be a shame that they live in a building that is little better than a squat and the only ‘groupies’ they get are about 12 years old. Sad, stories right there.

Shark Crime

Posted in Uncategorized on September 27, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

Here’s the shark fin post. I’ve been not in the mood for blogging recently, but this shark fin business is a huge issue.

I’ve swam with sharks in Malaysia (the Perhentian Islands are wonderful) and despite their bad reputation most sharks are not interested in eating humans. Shark attacks are very rare and usually sharks go after weak and sick fish for their prey. They are beautiful and impressive creatures and need protection. I urge anyone who sees Shark’s Fin Soup on the menu to immediately leave the restaurant, tell the management why you’re going and say that you will be back as a customer in the future when they take the offending dish off the menu.

Jaws was a great movie, well at least the first one was, but sharks really aren’t very dangerous to humans. It’s a movie that is far removed from the reality of these beautiful and noble creatures. I think the real ‘terrorists’ of the sea are actually the arseholes who catch sharks, the wankers who make them into soup, and the dickhead customers who buy the soup.

http://www.stopsharkfinning.net/videos.htm

Is an interesting site that makes for some truly depressing reading. Korea isn’t mentioned specifically, but pretty much any medium to top end Korean Chinese restaurant will have shark’s fin on the menu. Looking at the menus for all the international hotels in Seoul without exception they offer this ‘delicacy’.

I have eaten shark and I don’t have an issue with it, but the current 70.000.000 sharks a year killed purely for their fins is wasteful and completely unsustainable. I was speaking to a friend the other night and there are some streets in China where they sell nothing but shark fins! Catching a few sharks and eating them is not a problem, catching them ‘finning’ them and then throwing the body back to make more room on the fishing boat is a barbaric, nonsensical and wasteful practice.

The practice of catching a shark removing it’s fins and chucking the thing back in the sea is disgusting and must stop. Sharks are the apex predators of the sea and are absolutely vital to the health of our oceans. Koreans in general are completely ignorant of this fact and need to be informed.

This is an ecological and foodcrime of truly epic proportions.

Shark Soup? Just say no!

I Guess, We’re Out Of BETA, Next Up FISHCRIME!!

Posted in Uncategorized on July 27, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

We still have a lot of work to do.

In a similar style to the Dog Crime, thing this time it is much, much more serious.

The infishtigation over fish crime is getting intense. The more I uncover and the more I want to get this right.

I’ve been working off and on, regarding the article today and I really wanted to put more effort in. The more I discover about AsianKoreanFishFoodCrime the more I want to get my teeth into the case. It’s a very deep and complicated issue. It involves corrupt govenment, fishy fishers and some people who just want to make a buck or twenty. (it’s a billion dollar a year industry, so I’m being a bit James Bond about it)

If any volunteers want to help out on this truly serious issue then contact me @

foodcrime101@rocketmail if that doesn’t work then just comment. I think the site is attracting criminal attention already!

I reckon the initial article will be finished before my holiday starts.

Is this how seriously, Chinese people want to wipe out Sharks? I hope not, I really enjoyed diving with reef sharks so I really hope that the Chinese, Malays and Koreans don’t eat all of them before I get the chance to do it again.

This is a work in progress, a serious and well thought out post is coming soon.

PS. Does anyone know how to get the smileys working?

ITN: Dog Torture Report

Posted in Uncategorized on July 25, 2009 by koreanfoodcrime

Not for the fainthearted. Still a hidden industry, still illegal and still happening. Dog torture, genuine food crime.

As a meat eater myself I personally wouldn’t eat dog, but if others want to that is fine by me. What I do object to is the cruelty and the deliberate infliction of pain on the poor doggies to give Korean men with erectile dysfunction problems hard ons. The ridiculous and barbaric belief that tortured dogs help men have sex better, or better sex, is barbaric and backwards.

Korea, Sparkling?

More like

Korea, Torturing!

I wish upon the dog torturers the same fate as the poor dogs and cats get.